War of the Worlds (2025) Review - Embarrassingly awful remake

It's been awhile since I saw a film as bad as this; since a film embodied all the worst aspects of modern filmmaking, since a film failed in every category conceivable, since a film felt like it had a shred of a soul.

War of the Worlds (2025) is an embarrassment of a film that even I with my contrarian valour cannot defend; for such an iconic story with countless adaptations, from concept albums to graphic novels over a century, it's impressive to rank at the bottom of barrel.

Beginning production amidst the COVID-19 pandemic, War of the Worlds reinvents H. G. Welles novel as a "screenlife" film, think Unfriended (2014) or Searching (2018) wherein the story is told entirely within the screens of smart devices like tablets or monitors. It's still a relatively novel concept and when looking for a silver lining does at least offer a distinct relic for modern times.... but that's where my praise ends. Personally, I find it to be a tacky, grossly simplified approach, which particularly in the case of War of the Worlds, is barely above the level of mass-produced AI slop. Here, the use of such an approach serves no other purpose than to throw together a minimum effort and cost paycheck for Ice Cube and company.

It's obvious to make the excuse that the film's use of phones and such is simply a modern equivalent to Orson Welles' use of radio for his infamous 1938 broadcast, a landmark performance that has defined the legacy of the novel and Welles. Sure you can suggest that but I contend that to be a superficial stance on the matter; yes like how the radio was how information was shared the phone would be 2025's replacement but how do these two artists utilise these mediums. Welles' broadcast blurs the lines between reality and fiction allowing his take to satirise the language and models of early broadcasting. Here, we get a cluttered assortment of video calls, Microsoft Teams chats and found footage that look straight out a YouTube video, something at least tolerable when on an amateurish level like that - not when its proceeded by the Universal logo.

"Show don't tell" is a simplified rule to screenwriting that often can feel like a cliche more so than anything but rang all too true throughout. Whether it be a text message or dialogue, subtly evades the screenplay as characters awkwardly and stiltedly talk as a series of prompts rather than humans. Sure, we could communicate Ice Cube's strained relationships through visual hints or body language but why bother trying when we can just have Ice Cube type this into an email that can get flashed onscreen.

The alien threat in War of the Worlds is straight out of the worst of Roland Emmerich - hell this makes Moonfall (2022) look like Stalker (1979). Beyond a design that'd fit right at home in the most generic of FPS games, there is a level of pseudo-science that even for Hollywood science-fiction standards is absurd. Obviously with a fictional alien race, realism is an impossible expectation but you would at the least hope they can hold some thematic resonance or quantifiable threat to the protagonist. The issue is that their threat is so abstract and ridiculous it's impossible to genuinely difficult to care; when you have a conflict you can't care about mixed with a cast you can't care about you get a review that can't care about much of the film beyond how little you can care for the film!

It's a big cynical void of greed and laziness only watchable under ironic lenses. Just come up with whatever drinking game is necessary to get through this slog because who cares?

0.5/5